I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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