what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
