OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
