Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize