so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
