Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
