who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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