oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
