Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
