Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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