I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize