he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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