He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
i drank out of a bidet.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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