why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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