So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
