you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
