At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
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