I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
