what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
