He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize