Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
