So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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