ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
