Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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