Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
don't judge my taste in strippers
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
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