i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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