Kiss
Puke
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
