can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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