community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
