She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
