I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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