I need help removing her.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
