if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
