so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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