All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
