i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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