She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I wish I only lived at night.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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