rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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