She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
