my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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