do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize
