id be glad to
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
ugly people sure do ruin things
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
