Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
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I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
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