I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
