Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
