plz talk dirty to me
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Randomize
