Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
a search helicopter?!
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
