Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
