New invention idea: vibrating tampons
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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