4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off